Train To Be A Dictator In Less Than 2 Years!

So my boss suggested I write an article on Saddam Hussein. This struck me a s a little odd considering my serious articles tie in with a variety of career and educational subjects. Being the goofball I sometimes am I asked him how I would plug education into an article about Saddam Hussein… so I gave him some suggestion.

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So what would be the criteria for a dictator in training?

Communications:

A dictator has to have special authorization from higher powers such as one dictator claimed

God told me to invade Iraq, Bush tells Palestinian ministers

Marketing

Every good dictator must choose and develop a unhealthy obsession such as the rug. The obsession must be something that makes absolutely no sense to anyone else but the dictator and he or she must be able to justify the obsession to the point that makes his followers also believe that the obsession is a necessity.

Event Planning

Dictators must learn how to manage extravagant ceremonies. No expense spared at inauguration

National Security

Dictators must work in secrecy and keep several key elements cloak-and-dagger, even from those who say they are your allies.

Public Relations

Dictators must learn the to promote themselves.

Travel & Hospitality

Dictators travel with large entourages to protect them.

Communications

A dictator must make public statements and include personal thoughts into everyday life that places huge neon light bright question marks above the people’s heads. Such as

"I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here."

—at the President's Economic Forum in Waco, Texas, Aug. 13, 2002

"We both use Colgate toothpaste."

—after a reporter asked what he had in common with British Prime Minister Tony Blair

"I'm the commander — see, I don't need to explain. I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being president."

—as quoted in Bob Woodward's Bush at War

Look it up in the dictionary: One who "dictates" … blah blah blah. A leader who is granted total emergency power usually by the Roman Senate.” The USA may not be in Rome, but… The U.S. Senate bowed to Bush by passing the Patriot Act and the Military Commissions Act, both of which bills pretty much grant "total emergency power."

President now seems to be the Dictator choice of titles seeing that Saddam Hussein’s title was "President of Iraq."

You are one of the more creative of the dictators. When not writing poetry you're devising your own version of communism. As over two million Chinese staved to death because of your little experiment you should have stuck to writing sappy songs! What tin-pot dictator are you? Take the "What Dictator am I?" test at PoisonedMinds.com