What Makes A Twinkie?

Twinkies contain actual flour, sugar, salt, baking soda, water and a trace of egg. But the rest of the 39 ingredients are not generally what you find in a pantry.

THE FILLING

• Shortening (in the form of partially hydrogenated vegetable oil and/or beef fat) is the main ingredient.
• Polysorbate 60 is a gooey substance that helps replace cream and eggs at a fraction of the cost. It's derived from corn, palm oil and petroleum.
• Cellulose gum gives the crème filling a smooth, slippery feel.
• Artificial vanillin is synthesized in petrochemical plants. The real thing comes from finicky tropical orchids that are pollinated by hand on the one day they bloom.

THE CAKE

• Lecithin is an emulsifier made from soy. It's also used in paint to keep pigments evenly dispersed.
• Diacetyl mimics the taste of butter, since the real stuff would go rancid on a store shelf.
• Cornstarch is a common thickener. But it's more often used to make cardboard and packing peanuts.
• Yellow No. 5, Red No. 40 give the cake the golden look of eggs.
• Sorbic acid, the only actual preservative in Twinkies, comes from petroleum.

TWINKIE FACTS

• Calories: 145 each
• Shelf life: 25 days—not years, as urban legend would have it
• History: In 1930, James Dewar found a way to use idle baking pans. He named the cakes after seeing an ad for "Twinkle-Toe" shoes. Shelf life was just two to three days.

Eating Out Isn't Always Eating Healthy

Britney Spears Straight Jacket Doll On eBay

Britney Spears shorn likeness has been forever preserved in clay thanks to a clever opportunist featuring their novel creation on eBay. The doll is modelled after Britney Spears and comes complete with its own straight jacket and Britney’s now-signature bald head.

eBayauction has already ended though.

Trashy R2D2


An incredibly detailed replica of R2-D2. Step on R2’s center “foot” and his dome swings wide to collect your trash.
From Think Geek

Tesco sells dancing poles for kids

When I grow up I want to be a Stripper!

Tesco has been forced to remove a pole-dancing kit from the toys and games section of they’re website after numerous complaints.

The Tesco Direct site advertises the kit with the words, "Unleash the sex kitten inside...simply extend the Peekaboo pole inside the tube, slip on the sexy tunes and away you go!

"Soon you'll be flaunting it to the world and earning a fortune in Peekaboo Dance Dollars".

The £49.97 kit comprises a chrome pole extendible to 8ft 6ins, a 'sexy dance garter' and a DVD demonstrating suggestive dance moves.

Tesco denied the pole dancing kit was sexually oriented and said it was clearly marked for "adult use".

A spokesman added: "Pole dancing is an increasing exercise craze. This item is for people who want to improve their fitness and have fun at the same time."

Also on sale on the Tesco website is a strip poker game, "Peekaboo Poker" which is illustrated by a picture of a reclining woman in underwear.

The card game is is described as a game that "risks the risque and brings a whole lot of naughtiness to the table.

"Played with a unique pack of Peekaboo Boy and Girl playing cards, the aim of the game is to win as many Peekaboo chips as possible and turn them into outrageously naughty fun."

Beauty treatments you don’t discover until your drunk

From Women's Health

A barbecue-sauce wrap
A spa in Texas (where else?) starts you off with a peppercorn rub, then coats your flesh with a mixture of paprika, cayenne pepper, and tomato paste. It's meant to be exfoliating, but who cares about being silky if you have to smell like a hot wing?

A cedar-chip soak
One California spa says these wood chips soften skin. We say there are too many soft spots where we don't want a splinter.

A beer pedicure
According to a spa in Chicago, the hops and enzymes moisturize your skin as you soak in the brew. Bring your own pretzels.

A bird-dropping facial
This Hawaiian spa treatment uses nightingale excrement to smooth and brighten skin. Next they'll tell us pigeon poo makes great lotion.

LED For Your Dog - Emo Dogs

You love your dog… you don't Love your dog, but you’re really keen for they’re companionship. As a matter of fact your probably one of those freaks people who takes your dog with them almost every where you go. However, there are still No Dogs Allowed places and that makes you sad. Cheer up! I have anther place where you can take your dog.

Don’t leave your dog at home when you goes to raves – with LED blinking collars your dog can join you for some groovy times

For approximately $23 your dog can dance away with his or her own light up toys… and don’t tell me your dog doesn’t par take to enjoy the salsa dancing colors…Don’t make me mention that one night at your place where you asked your friends what if?

It should be known that Visiglo lighted collars are more comfortable for dogs to wear, so if your looking for a bottom toy, go for the LED leashes. If your not quite that much of a freak and you just want to enjoy a day at the beach with your fury one, don’t forget the Chicken Scented Bubbles

Chicken Scented Bubbles

Chicken Scented Bubbles

If "Willy Wonka" and his Chocolate Factory had a dog, I have no doubt that there would be Dog Wonka factory with the newest and coolest pet toys yet to be discovered. The first dog invention could have been the one already on the market today called Fetch A Bubble - Chicken Scented Bubbles

Chicken Scented Bubbles is the newest but yet to be seen great new dog toy called Fetch a Bubble. It was put into production after TV documentaries recognized that dogs love bubbles. While it may be funny to watch your dog’s face after catching a soapy bubble, it isn’t very nice. So chicken scented bubbles was born. However,

Features:

• Safe, effective fun for Dogs of all age and sizes.
• Can be used as a means of exercise.
• Blows thousands of bubbles in 1 minute.
• Suitable for indoor and outdoor use.
• Requires 6 x AA batteries (not included)
• Includes 4 oz. of scented Gazillion bubble solution.

Where to buy: Funrise Consumer Service, 800-882-3808; in stores sometime this year

Bowing To The Bow Wow

Changing Your Monday Attitude From Non Productive Bad To Efficiently Bad

I’m not going to lie - I am far from the cheerleading peppy girl on Mondays. As a matter of fact, I’m more like the Basket Case from the Breakfast Club when I come in every Monday. I walk in, go straight to my desk with that “I’m here aren’t I” expression on my face and the first thing I grab is my empty coffee cup soon to be filled with coffee so thick, you practically need rolling papers.

I know that I’m supposed to gleefully tell you that all you simply need to do is put on smile and have a great attitude towards a fresh new start to a week full of possibilities… {Bleep} that!

Sunday nights is my night to go to my favorite nigh club. Can there be anything more devious to ruin your Monday than a bubbly colleague who is full of the joys of work unfinished and yet to come?

As a Los Angeles implant (like the majority of Beverly Hills and Santa Monica), I am geologically programmed to spot the cloud that smothers the silver lining. So when I come across an connoisseur in happiness sending ripples of joy across my personal pool of gloom on Monday, my first reaction is a low warning growl.

I enjoy my Monday misery, I find it to be a creative stream, - a polluted Los Angeles River stream of media trash, but nevertheless, I find creation in it. Any other day of the week, I’m pretty OK and am even quite chipper, but not on Mondays.

I’ve tried reading several Be Happy Monday articles and blogs and how to be a happy person regardless of how you wake up. From all of my reading, I have determined one thing and three choices.

1) The blissfully smiling profile web site author pictures are deeply disturbing. I believe they’re aliens from an invading extraterrestrial world in human camouflage. Much like small toy dogs.

Choice #1 - I give up my Sunday night club social outing

Choice #2 – I don’t give up my Sunday night club social outing but find a way to be cheery

Choice #3 – I set afire choice # 1 & choice #2 and come up with some great cheater tips on getting through Monday.

I chose Choice #3 - NOTE: Don’t use too much lighter fluid – it’s overkill.

After I put out the fire, I came up with a list of some cheater tips. I hope they work as well for you as they do for me.

1. Make sure your desk is clean and organized on Friday. The goal is to be left alone every Monday and a messy desk invites intervention.

2. Walk quickly from the front door to your office and don’t make any stops on the way.

3. Never say hello to anyone on Monday, saying hello will encourage conversation.

4. Prepare almost completed daily work assignments on Friday so that on Monday you just need to do the unimportant details.

5. Keep your co workers away from you by talking about really weird non ordinary topics.

6. Get some sleep at your desk by sitting as you normally do but closing your eyes and moving your mouse around unconsciously. This way it looks like your reading and researching.

7. Find a co worker who stays out late on a week night (other than Sunday) and trade slacker time. In exchange for picking up some of your work load and covering for you on Mondays, cover for him / her on they’re slacker day.


8. Take a lot of one to two minute breaks - if you’re a chick don’t be too proud to use the cramps excuse, most guys do not even want to hear the first syllable of the word menstrual let alone the minor details of cramping. Most women understand and will leave ya alone for the rest of the day.

If you’re a guy, just use the “I got in to a fight with my girlfriend and we talked all night” excuse.

9. Drink a lot of water. Not only will this help you get over your hang over quicker, but you’ll have to use the bathroom more often.

10. Make sure to do your job exceptionally good on the other four days and your boss will most likely overlook your Monday badness.

Ten Warning Signs That Your Not happy In Your Current Job